Hell’s Half Acre

We’re coming off almost a month of family visits and had such a lovely time with everyone.  That said, February was the last time our family was together and we’re now enjoying being a family once again and letting the emotions out from the loss of Jamie’s mom.  I must owe a gazillion to the therapy jar as a few days ago Sissy revealed she had no idea her grandmother had died.  How she didn’t know but the other 3 did know, I have no idea.  She also seems to have completely gotten over her intense need to be connected to Jamie since his absence and happily sleeps in the (previously) boys’ room and no longer needs to know where Jamie is at every moment of the day.  He is both happy that she’s found independence but also worried that she’s masking anger or something for his leaving.  So, more funds to the therapy jar.

Did someone mention something about sickness? We sure do have lots of ways to say “pig” in Mexico.  We’re riding out the storm of flu worries and hoping for the best.

Pandemic Booklet put out by SF folks…

Flu Wiki with links to news articles

Idaho’s Pandemic page

WHO’s swine flu page

Dr. Sanjay Gupta on the ground in DF tweets

Biosurveilance blog

Cold and flu treatment

It was a weird Sunday yesterday.  Normally this is the day that most Mexican families are out grocery shopping but many of the Chedraui shelves were weirdly empty (NO canned salsa to be found anywhere) and I ended up at WalMart for whole wheat flour.  I’ve never been a big believer in the 3-month supply of food adage, as food spoils so incredibly easily down here, but we now have lots of rice, beans, pasta, pet food, canned salsas , rajas, and tomato sauces.  With 2 kids and Jamie down with headaches, sore throats, fever, tiredness and nausea I’m hoping for a weird virus or mild cases of something.  Crossing fingers and hoping QRoo really does have more than 120 doses of Tamiflu.  I’m guessing that the death toll in Mexico is exaggerated only in reference to the number of cases.  Either the deaths are higher due to non-swine flu deaths or the actual number of cases are much much higher (I read somewhere something in the 100K range) and as such, the death toll relatively low.  What we’re preparing for is not a deadly disease but if this flu becomes pandemic, I expect that supplies will be especially low here at the bottom of the country and there will be fewer people well enough to move supplies around.  So we’re stocking up and crossing our fingers along with the rest of the world.

Other than the week my parents were here, I’ve come to the realization that we’ve been living life at 1/2 speed.  The first week or so that he was gone we tried to to life as usual.  I studied, we homeschooled, and kept things rolling along.  Little by little things dropped.  School stopped when Papa and Tata arrived.  Speaking Spanish stopped then also.  I can’t remember the last time we had a family meeting.  This last week I’ve felt so 1/2 full of life, so melancholy, so “missing something” and today it is going to change.  He already emailed from the regional aiport he’s leaving from and should be here around 2-2:30pm today.  He’s flying Wisconsin to Georgia and I can’t imagine weather delays in Georgia to keep him from arriving in Cancun.  But I suppose we’ll check the airline just to make sure.

The light, the spark, the happiness is coming back into our lives and we can’t wait.  Daddy’s coming home.  We also just changed to daylight savings time so I really need to make sure I’ve got the times right or he’s going to be a very grumpy light/spark/happiness.

Update:  His flight got in early – so he is already at Atlanta.  He should leave there at 12:18 heading home (CUN).

And to pass the time, while we’re waiting for him to board, here are some exercise-related PSAs.  Do not attempt Ashtanga Yoga while listening to “Wait Wait..” if Paula Poundstone is on.  I was going through the standing sequence while Peter Sagal was interviewing Michael Pollan and Paula had me laughing so hard I couldn’t even get into the asanas.  PSA #2, if you’re trying to pass someone on the trail, make sure you lift your feet or you’ll come crashing down and scrape your knee badly.  You should be able to soldier on and finish your run though.  After sitting on the ground for 5 mintues waiting for the pain to subside.  Practice LIFTING the feet on the run.  PSA #3, it is about 20 degrees F cooler at 8am than at 9am.  Enormous difference from 98F/38C to 77F/25Cish and you’ll go from thinking you’ll never be able to run further than 3 miles without dying at the end at 98/38, to crashing badly on the trail, limping, then walking, and running an extra 1/2 mile and fishing with energy at 77/25.  Go figure.  From now on, I’m going early.

It is a sad Wednesday.  Ellen and I saw my folks off to the airport today, an end to an absolutely lovely visit.  Unfortunately, their laptop died this morning so they’ll have lots of errands to do upon return to California.   We’re planning on seeing them this August for their 50th wedding anniversary but it was still incredibly sad watching them leave.  That, and the fact that my husbandito has apparently DESERTED me (I’m guessing that might result in an email ) and we’re all feeling very lonely and sad.  Well, all of us except the kids who are out playing with homemade spears and sheilds and don’t even seem to notice that people are disappearing from here at a very rapid pace.

I do, however, have sisters arriving in the next week and I’m hopeful that husbandito will find his way home again (that is, unless he has found the bachelor life, sans kids and nagging witch to be more heavenly than bickering kids and bitching wife).

I can’t gush enough about our visit with the old farts – it was simply lovely and it passed by MUCH too fast.  We can’t wait until they come back.

Well, after moping about for a bit, I’ve found some focus.  Some haciendas to visit and a training program.  I’m already running 3 miles every other day (3-4x/week) so the first 3 weeks should be doable.  The hacienda tours are just to salivate over.  Maybe for when Chris and family come to visit…

Diesel doesn’t count.  Get up at dawn.  Somehow manage to get back to sleep without tossing and turning and staring at white walls.  Enjoy a lovely breakfast and cawfee.  Get stuff together for trip.  Wake sleepyheads.  Drive 2 hours to Valladolid.  Drive to Convent San Bernardino de Siena.  Brush off the small children selling mamey and asking for money.  Tour the convent with a very knowledgeable and relaxed guide who asks for $10MN per adult.  Give him $100MN after spending a good 30-45 minutes touring the convent and listening to history.  Pile in the car and head to the town center and settle in for a sumptious lunch of conchita pibil, puc choc w/refried beans and small salad, escabeche, 2 tortas (jamon con queso) with sides of refried beans and papas fritas, one order of beef steak with papas on the side, 3 salads, 3 pitchers of freshly made limonada and watermellon juice, and a coffee.  Pay $760MN which includes a $100MN tip.  Sit and enjoy a luxurious lunch while the kids swim in the restaurant pool.  Head 3 blocks to cenote and swim in the cenote or get bit by red ants.  Tough choice.  Pay $85MN entrance fee for all 7.  On the way home, get ice cream for 7 and have money left over.  You still haven’t spent your $100USD.  As a matter of fact, you have a LOT left over.

It was so lovely being back in Yucatan state.  Maybe I’m just jaded but it seems like everyone over here in QRoo has one hand out for money and the other in your back pocket.  Even the taxistas in Valladoild are tranquil.  I parked in a taxi stand and asked the driver sitting the shade on a park bench if I could just sit in the car while the family headed to the paleteria.  He was totally fine and even moved to give us room on the bench to sit.  Try that with a QRoo taxista and you’ll be missing fingers before you even put the car in park.  We had a lovely good-bye day with Papa and Tata.  I gave them the choice of Punta Allen (with a possible stop at Boca Paila again) or Valladolid and Tata really wanted Valladolid.  We’ve always enjoyed our trips there and today was no different.  The weather was perfect – breezy and warm – and the people lovely.  We’ll be terribly sad to see them off tomorrow but are so thankful for the time we had with them here.  It was a perfect trip.

It has been eleventy-six kinds of crazy-craziness around here lately. Jamie gone, Jesse gone, homeschooling, studying, doing laundry by hand, cooking, cleaning, exercising, and the endless dentist appointments. But we love our dentist. So, pretty much just bullet points.

I am getting really sick of waking at 4am and stumbling through the day, falling asleep between 9pm and 10pm and getting up the next morning and staring at the dark walls waiting for dawn. Again. It’s the damn hot flashes that wake me, but for some reason I’m not able to go back to sleep. So I watch the ceiling and the walls and the windows and wait…wait….wait…for the sun to come up. And then I head out and either don’t worry about waking Kilo (puppy) for Yoga or try and tiptoe out so I can take a run. I’ve been running 3 miles every other day and it seems to be working out well. Right now I’m about an 11 min/mile, which is pretty slow, but it is working for now.

Jesse came back from the frozen north on the same day that Papa and Tata graced us with their presence.  Both flights got in at the same time but different terminals, so we got Jesse first and the grandfolks second.  They must have cleared customs in record time because we were on the road home less than an hour after their flights arrived.  We have been loving each moment that Papa and Tata have been here – they have amazing stories, Kilo is in LOVE with Papa, they make us amazing homemade pasta, they are fun to hang out with and they’re up for anything.  Tomorrow we’re headed to Valladolid so they can see something with a bit of colonial flare.  We’ll hit at least one cenote, probably Dzitnup, and make it a day trip.  They go home on Wednesday and we’ll be so sad to see them go.

It is almost heaven-on-Earth to have a working washing machine.  It conked out once and Pedro was able to get it moving again, but then it developed a different problem and was totally unusable.  One day we headed to Boca Paila and spent the day on the beach and came home with a huge load of sandy towels.  I was dreading the handwashing of all that gear and decided to try the washer and it worked!  Today I headed over to pay Pedro and he replied that he’d done nothing!  The washer must have fixed itself and at a most opportune moment.  It still makes horrific sounds that freak Papa out as he tries to work at the table next to it, but hey it is WORKING!  And all I have to do it babysit it.  Sweet!

Jamie is hoping to head home in a little over a week and we’re really looking forward to seeing him again.  I’m almost used to being a single mom though – it will require a little adjustment and a HUGE adjustment on his end when the tropical heat hits his fragile Wisconsin skin.  It is definitely heating up and temperatures of 36C/96F are not abnormal.  We have really not kept in contact well; he is not comfortable on email and I’ve honestly been too busy to even email, let alone call.  Hopefully, now that the washer is one with the gods, I’ll have loads more time for him.

I can’t even begin to try and remember the highlights of the past 1/2 month, but this will have to do.  If I don’t post now I probably never will.

Life has definitely been “interesting” this past week.

Kilo has fleas and we’ve been washing each and every piece of cloth in sight.  Each and every load Pike has to ask me, “Mom, wouldn’t it be easier to just buy a NEW washer?” and I tell him that as long as this one washes it is useful and we’ll just keep babying it along until it dies.  It needs to be babied through each rinse cycle and each spin cycle.  Kind of a PITA but the plants are loving the water.

It seems like I add 3 more items for each I cross items off my ToDo list.  So I just gave up on it for a while and am ignoring it.  Seems to work so much better that way.

A few days ago I noticed that Kilo (the puppy) was scratching himself more than usual.  I had just changed his food (to a “better” one) and have been immersing myself in what food is best and all the crap put into dog food and what he needs and how to make it and raw vs cooked and then we found fleas on him.  Ack!  So, I’ve been washing everything not nailed down trying to avoid an infestation.  But since our washer needs to be babied through each rinse and spin cycle, this makes for an “interesting” load of work.  And makes Mt. Laundry even more monsterous.   I think the Frontline is working because he either had a lot of black dirt (which we don’t have here) on him or he had a lot of dead fleas.  But since he still had live, feasting ones, I got some flea soap and yesterday he got 2 fleabaths.  I hope that between the flea baths and the cleaning we might avoid an infestation?  Oh, I really hope so!  I’ll take any pointers anyone wants to share there.  His next application of Frontline isn’t due until the 26th or so of this month.

It was recently brought to my attention that a local family has been trying to convert Ellen to Christianity since December.  Slowly working on her until they got her to lie and invent details for them.   Needless to say I was pissed through and through.  I am SO grateful to the family that alerted me and strangely, somewhat thankful to the fanatics.  Because now my daughter has the perfect model of what an unsafe person does and has tools to deal with them.  She knows that an adult coercing a child to their way of thinking is wrong IN ANY SITUATION and what to do if that should happen again.  And that is a very important lesson to learn, and thankfully she was able to learn it without enduring physical abuse.   They only mind-fucked her.  Yeah, I’m still a little pissed off.

I’ve been consistently running 30 minutes a day without any calf pain problem and I really think I’ve licked that particular injury.  Took quite a while as I injured myself the first week of January.  So I’m really happy with that.  Yesterday, after some 45 mintues of exercise, I made it home and headed out for a cool-down walk.  One of my little neighbors saw me and exclaimed, “are you THAT tired just walking from your house???”  Dayum, it is tough getting old.  

Jamie’s mom is still hanging in there.  According to her doctors, she was supposed to die yesterday.  So she’s behind schedule.  Dayum, the pressure to perform never ends.  We never imagined we’d be looking at over 2 weeks of hotel and restaurant bills but I suppose we’ll just keep sucking it up.  We’re looking at having my folks come and babysit the kids here (actually it will be such a joy to see them that I’ve considered lying to get them to come down ) while I go up to Jamie.  I’d rather wait for a funeral/life celebration instead of the staring-at-the-walls-waiting-for-death Groundhog Day that they are trapped in but we’ll just have to see what happens.  I also need to get the flea situation under control, ensure Ellen is safe from the fanatics and help her find new friends before I go anywhere (IF I go anywhere).  The daughters fo the fanatics are just her age and she has never had a friend her age since we started traveling.

And I can’t even blame it on the doggie wog.  Who is just a dear.  We all love him so much and he has made this separation (husbandito and Jesse in WI) so much easier – especially for the kids.  They have been back for almost 2 weeks now, buring up the credit cards and freezing.  It is absolutely incomprehensible to me that it could be that cold.  Jesse sent pictures and it is just snow and white and white and snow and I think I fainted for a moment.

Husbandito believes there is very little time left and he is very glad he went back.  I am now trying to decide what to do.  I very much want to go backand support him through this loss but I just can’t see how to afford it.  He and his brother are staying at a local hotel as they are too allergic to animals to stay with their sister (husbandito’s brother is even more allergic than husbandito) and their own childhood home is, well, apparently no longer their childhood home.  At any rate, they’re not welcome to stay there.  So if the kids and I came up, it would entail another hotel room, a larger car rental and eating out at restaurants constantly.   So I’m thinking we’ll probably stay here even though I want to be there for Jamie and the kids would also like to go back.  And there is also doggie wog.  Just not sure he’ll be allowed into the US.

I thought about driving (no car rental or plane tickets) and am still mulling that over.

So at 3am, my mind full of all this stuff, I tossed for a couple hours, called it a night and got up.  Brain dead, but awake.  And how is this different from other days?  You are all such smart asses. 

I am lucky enough to be saddled with a mate who not only appreciates but excels in black humour.  The day he and Jesse left we were getting ready for our exercise walk and I, un-coffeed, was in a somewhat, well, shall we say, “less than chipper” mood, remarked that he would have to keep his mom going strong until April.  It would just be too cold to go back now.  I couldn’t even begin to imagine the cold there, so he was just going to have to keep her alive and kicking until it warmed up enough for a funeral we would be able to attend.  He agreed, there was just no way I was going out now.  Too Damn Cold.

I was hanging out on my boat in the middle of that river in Egypt for so long that I was shocked senseless when he and Jesse headed to the security at the airport.  We’d dropped them off at the curb, figuring they’d need lots of time waiting in line, and parked.  By the time we got inside the terminal they had already obtained boarding passes and were itching to get to their gate.  They still had 75 minutes before the plane left but wanted to get to the gate, so we said our goodbyes and they headed off to security with me still wondering if we’d gotten to the airport early enough for them to get their boarding passes.  This is really a very nice and tranquil river here.

Jesse is becoming such a little man and at the same time I wonder how he rationalizes some of the stuff he does.  He has always been my boy but he is pulling away and I think this trip will be the beginning of a huge gash in the apron strings.  It feels like I’m losing him and I emotionally fight it and logically embrace it.  It is a hard line to hold.  He is getting closer and closer to his Dad and I find myself a little jealous of their bond.  He has always been “my” boy and now he’s changing teams.  It makes perfect sense and is perfectly normal but I am still missing my widdo boy.

It finally got warm enough to get in the water and the three kids and I spent yesterday afternoon kayaking about our bay.  It has been wicked windy and much colder than normal this year, so the planets must have really alligned in order to bring both calm winds and warm weather together.  we went much further out than we have before and I could see the boats in the marina of Pto. Adventuras (6km to the south).  I really need to get a waterproof camera so I can take pictures next time.  I had considered trying to bring my with me but couldn’t find one waterproof bag.  So disposable camera it will have to be for the next time.  We hit a book sale in town yesterday, to benefit the local pet shelter, and I got 13 new (to me) books.  I’m really looking forward to reading them but need to get my studying ass in gear before I even think about starting.  I haven’t done any studying since Jamie left, but I have been adding more and more to the “to do” list.  Sounds about even to me.

The puppy has made this separation so much easier on the kids – Sissy and Pike partay into the dawn hours and cuddle with puppy.  He also keeps them Very Busy during the day.  I’m so glad he was gifted to us – I don’t know what we would be doing without him.  We settled on a name; Kilo Papageorgio.

I started this yesterday and really just need to end it and get it out there.   Our love to Dan and Elinor and Maca and hope things get easier instead of harder.

Jamie and Jesse are flying back to the frozen midwest today to say goodbye to Jamie’s mother.  And I am just shallow enough to be happy to hold down the Mexican fort, kids and puppy in exchange for avoiding the freezing frozieness that is the midwest in late February.  I was actually thinking, “how bad could it be” as I booked hotel, flights and rental car until I noitced that Delta’s website was warning of weather delays in Minneapolis.  So I checked the weather for Chicago (the first place they’ll land). Yikes.  I’ve heard accounts and read about weather that cold but pushed it out of my mind as some impossible tall tale that hearty folks tell.  Yikes.  I think my brain has lost the capacity to understand temperatures lower than 50F.

I’m still complaining when it gets cold here though.  And 70F is still quite cold!

So, I have surprisingly become an early-mroning person.  Why, you ask yourself, would a perfectly sane person swap night-owl status for early-morning status?  A good question, I would answer because early-morning is quite simply an absolutely INSANE time to be awake!  All the sane people are still sleeping at o’dark-30 and only masochists get up before noon.  Hey, I agree wholeheartedly.  But for some strange reason, my kids seem to think that a whining puppy is cause for immediate action and cause emergent to wake everyone peacefully sleeping.  So, I get up.  What is this “puppy” that I speak of?  A Canadian family here is raising hypoallergenic, non-allergic puppies for sale.  This is apparently a cross between a Maltese and a Yorkshire Terrier.  The result is a “Yorkie”.  On Valentine’s Day, they decided to gift us a puppy and we’re still reeling from the shock.  Everyone LOVES puppy-wuppy, but no surprise to anyone but me, he is a bit more work than a kid.

We’re really hoping that he’s non-allergenic enough for my sister’s family to visit in April.  Everyone is really looking forward to the California and Minnesota contingent of aunts, uncle and cousins.  This will be the second visit from the California relatives and the first for Minnesota (you’d think they’d want to get out of the snow more frequently, but apparently not until now.  So we’re very glad they’ve decided to pop on down.   We’re hoping to take both contingents to Merida to visit our house and see the sights of Merida.

We’re also thinking of heading over for Carnaval.  We LOVED Carnaval in Cozumel last year and it will be hard to top that experience, but we’ll let Merida try.  I’ve been keeping a really tight reins on the spending, especially since we’ll be spending quite a bit more when the relatives arrive, but our good friends Jonna and Mimi convinced us.  Frankly, I’ll take any excuse to visit them.  Oh, and if you guys are reading this, you are now married.    Ellen was telling me that girls couldn’t marry girls and I told her that Oh Yes They CAN and not only could girls marry girls and boys marry boys, that Jonna and Mimi were married.  Gave her a little to think about.  Her main playmates are Mormon kids and I suspect that between the Disney movies (girl marries boy) and Mormon folk she had a warped view of society.  I think I need to drag out the Flowers for Al and Don photos and remind her.

It is looking like both Pike and Sissy will be requiring braces.  Sissy needs some teeth pulled and both will start with 6-8 months of retainer with monthly visits to the orthodontist coming from Merida.  Then they’ll get the braces for a year.  He only wants $6000/year and $600/month for each kid to accomplish this brilliant feat.  YIKES!  Yeah, that’s pesos, at $13 pesos/dollar, but that is still a LOT of money.  Pike goes back this morning for his “apparatus” which I assume is a retainer.  This guy speaks no English so I hope I got it all right.  I’ve ballooned up to 79 kilos and holding (for 3 days now) and am experiencing PMS for the first time in my life thanks to the wonders of menopause.  Two boys going through puberty and me going through menopause.  Makes for interesting times in the palapa.